Boot Camp – the one with the kamikaze

It’s raining which means boot camp is inside at the studio and I don’t have to run around in circles. I know I should really be working to improve my running but I’m secretly pleased.

A couple of extra people turn up. Larry was sick on Monday and Jenny was away on business so there are six of us instead of four.

Warm up

Four people start on step ups (up and down on a box about a foot high), one person is on a stepping machine and Merlin (Mr Elite) is doing chin-ups. We alternate and after chin-ups it’s back to step ups. Each cycle is two and a half minutes and the person doing chins gets 30 seconds to prepare before they start. Those of us who are two weak to do a chin up just hang supporting our body weight and changing grip from overhand to underhand every 10 to 20 seconds. I count out 210 step ups before I get a go on the stepping machine. All up this only takes 15 minutes but feels like forever.

Circuit

The circuit is repeated three times one minute on each exercise (expect for prone hold which is done on both sides for a total of two minutes). Rest of one minute between sets and no rest (just changeover time between exercises). All exercises are done with a partner alternating from one person and then the other.

Sit ups

Sit ups with a weighted medicine ball. Person on the floor holds the ball with straight arms. Partner stands on their toes to brace the ‘sit upee’. Person doing the sit ups tries to reach at the top of the sit up to touch their partners hands which are held in front of the stomach.

Push-ups / prone hold or plank position

Push up position with one hand on the weighted ball. Bend the elbow of the hand on the ball so that your back and hips are level (essentially prone hold or plank). I could only manage to do a couple of push ups in this position each cycle but the boys managed up to 20. If it really hurts like hell, just staying in the prone hold position is pretty darn good. Repeat on the other side.

Squats

Weighted ball on your chest or slightly out in front. Just up and down, normal squats with feet hip width apart.

Standing lunge

Ball on the chest or, if you’re keen, held above your head. Alternating legs, I lunge first and then my partner lunges.

Knee thrust

Boxing pads are required for this exercise. The person doing the knee thrusts puts their hands around their partner’s neck (or on their shoulders) and thrusts the knee up into the pad Thai boxing style. Sound effects and John Claude van Damme splits are optional.

Shoulder charge

Nothing more complex than pushing your shoulder into the pad from side to side. Alternating feet and shoulders is necessary to minimise bruising. I’m OK with right leg lead, right shoulder into the pad but am truly uncoordinated with a left leg right shoulder combination. I don’t twist enough.

Recruits choice

We each get to choose an exercise that can be done without weights or equipment for one minute. Everyone in the group takes turns choosing and we all have to do what ever they select. So, in six minutes (or so, the guys really gave it 110% in the shoulder charging so their change overs are pretty slow) we do situps, prone hold, tricep dips, soccer roll see below, leg raises and burpees. After the last exercise everyone is gasping for air. It’s bloody hard doing 20 burpees in a row.

All up, this takes almost an hour and a half. I have an early meeting so I pack up to leave.

The boys are told that if they are able to answer a simple question, ‘What does kamikaze mean?’, they can go home, otherwise it’s another minute of burpees. I hear them counting out burpees as I walk down the path. Sgt Pain will repeat this process until they correctly answer the question he asks. I hope they’re not in a rush to get to work…